Rebellion, Normal for Kids, Painful for Parents

A good friend of mine recently confided in me that his two children are currently in a rebellious state of mind. One of them is grown so his role in that situation is but to pray, worry, and advise as opportunities arise. The other is prepubescent and he therefore has a much more active role in responding to this child's rebellion. This got me to thinking about my own children and the plight of parents everywhere. How to effectively deal with your children when they rebel, act out, test boundaries, etc.?

My own children are still quite young and as such easily managed. A stern look usually brings them in line. I do however see on the horizon a time when this will not be so. Due to the age difference between them there will come a time when my house is home to a 17 year old, 15 year old, and two 10 year olds. I dread this. How does one prepare for such a time? Other than doing your best to instill godly morals in your children and copious amounts of prayer, the answer is you don't.

As stated, my own children are yet quite young, so my first hand experience is limited to myself and observations of my peers. Seeing as how that is a small sample size any conclusions drawn are obviously quite unscientific, but draw them I must. My conclusion is this: Rebellion is to be expected. It is normal and more or less unavoidable. Adolescent children will push their parents in an attempt to discover their limits and test their boundaries, while young adults will almost invariably lose their minds and partake in all kinds of asinine behavior in an attempt at self discovery, and out of a desire to experience the world now that the proverbial leash has been removed.

I myself completely lost my mind after I joined the Army at age 20. I drank to much, partied to hard, wasted ungodly amounts of money, and acted horribly towards the young ladies who entered my life. The irony is, even as I did these things, I still believed in the moral values instilled in me in my youth, and if asked why I was acting so contrary to them had no answer. I knew what I was doing was wrong, just as when I act sinfully today I know it's wrong, at the time I just didn't care. I was young and invincible, and felt that there would be time to straighten my life out. For the time I just wanted to have fun and do what I wanted to do consequences be damned.

Like most people I eventually figured out that that was an empty life and there was no fulfillment or joy in licentiousness. I moved on, grew up, and started acting like an adult. This is not to say I haven't made numerous mistakes since this debauched period in my life, Lord knows I have and I thank both God and my wife for their seemingly bottomless well of forgiveness, but I have long since quit thinking of weekends as an audition for The Real World replete with drunken, anti-social behavior.

I guess where I'm going with this stream of consciousness drivel is here. My friend need not worry to much. The behavior of his children is normal. I did it, he did it, our wives did it, and all of us turned out more or less alright. God is good and we must trust him in all things especially when it comes to our children. That doesn't mean we have to like it. It is still painful. But free will is the norm. Good decisions will be made, as will bad. Life will go on.